Dr. Barbara Gilbert, a clinical psychologist practicing in Lawrence, spoke to Central Rotarians on February 12th about True Power Communication in conflict resolution.
Her presentation, which was based on a three-hour workshop that she conducts, listed ways to build a successful relationship.
“The fundamental premise is that there is no one right way to engage in a relationship except authentically,” she said. “Everything in a relationship is up for negotiation. Thus skills for authenticity and for various forms of negotiation are the building blocks for healthy relationships.”
Conflict in relationships usually is not true conflict but rather confusion about how to go about advocating well for ourselves. Saying that the more skills we have to negotiate the better, she listed three tools to use: personal respect, which nurtures a relationship; personal accountability, knowing what you want; and responsibility to respond effectively.
A personal awareness path, she said, starts with the five senses and how we interpret sensory responses. Emotions arise out of the interpretation, then longings and then intentions which we can choose consciously followed by conscious choice of action. Working with conflict resolution she said, our authentic selves are the only things we can bring to conflict resolution.
For more information about Dr. Gilbert check out her website at barbarajgilbertphd.com
